I had a friend ask me once why I don't try traditional dating. This was after having a conversation telling him about my attempts at online dating. The thing is to "traditionally" date someone you have to actually meet someone which is why I was attempting online dating. I need to get out and met guys. I have tried several different websites and even paid for the upgrade so that I could send and receives emails. I was making the attempt....with no luck. With all the fails I have had I decided online dating is not for me.
I am a plus size girl, but that shouldn't stop me from trying to find love. One website I tried was specifically for plus size people to find love. I should have followed my initial instinct when I saw the disclaimer about not sending money to anyone. I hadn't seen that before and I now know why it was on there. First off there was no one local, but I thought "that's okay I am willing to travel if he is". Several men from foreign countries and even a few from United States found me attractive and we chatted, but nothing came of it. Of the few men that I thought there might be potential, four were scams. Four!!!! Seriously what is the luck in that!
At least I can get a good laugh of it now and I didn't send any money. However I did send photos of myself, nothing risque, but none the less I sent photos and now I wonder if they will start online dating scams using my photos. I feel sorry for anyone who gets scammed.
OK the first guy I spoke with told me his name was Kelly and that he was in the United States Army and currently stationed in Afghanistan. His parents had passed away in a tragic car accident, his wife died of cancer, and he had one daughter. We spoke for a few weeks before I did some Google research.
I love Google! Google doesn't lie to me and for the most part tells me what I need to know. I appreciate Google! =)
Anyway.....so I did a Google image search of the photos Kelly has sent me. I found a website for guy a name Trevor Lance Scott who really was in the military, now retired, and does a little bit of acting and consult work for movies. I tell this to Kelly and he says he is sorry for not letting me know. He didn't want to scare me off. He also tells me shortly after we start messaging on Yahoo that he believes I am the love of his life and that I am the one he has been looking for and he wants to ask for leave from his post to come home and see me. I thought that was crazy, but I also thought "WOW" this guy wants to come to Washington and see ME!!! The only catch was I had to pay for his ticket from Kabul to me. SERIOUSLY!!! He said he would pay me back.....yeah right liar! I also know the military doesn't reimbursement for soldiers to pay for their own flights. The military pays for the flights to get soldiers back home! STRIKE ONE!
One guy, Matty is his name, told me he was a contractor and working on a project in the Republic of Benin in Africa. I thought that was pretty awesome that he got to the that. I honestly can't remember where he was originally from except it was a foreign country so I excused the poor typing. He typed the way someone would if he or she was speaking broken English. Shortly after we started talking through Yahoo messenger Matty said he wanted to move to Washington and be near me. He asked where I lived and I told him the city, but not my address. I was caught off guard by his quickness to move, but continued to speak with him. When I asked him about his family he didn't really have any. That is apparently a trend for online dating scammers. He told he was married, but his wife had passed away of cancer years ago, he was an only child and his parents had already passed some time ago. We continued to chat and then I didn't hear from him for a while. During our conversation we talked about his work which he said stressed him out. I wasn't an idiot and had already been doing some online searching into dating scams because of other men I was talking to. When I searched his photos nothing came up so I figured that as a good sign. At one point he said some piece of machinery had broke and he need to get a new one ordered. Oddly he needed my help with that. I told him no. There was no way I was sending money over seas to someone I didn't really know. We continued to talk and then he disappeared for a while and when I heard from him again he had left Africa and was in the United Kingdom. When I asked how he was doing he said that he was having some issues with getting some stuff in the country and it was stuck in customs. I asked him what was stuck and he said "gold". Who the hell brings gold from Africa!!! I am not saying it can't happen, but seriously! He said he needed to pay to get some paper work from the Republic of Benin to the UK so he could get his gold. I told him good luck and we haven't spoke since. STRIKE TWO!
Brent told me he was originally from Texas and doing contract work in Afghanistan. He was in the Army, but did his time and got out. He had a cute little girl name Alyssa that was staying with an Aunt back home while he was working. His wife had passed away three years ago. Our conversation were short when we chatted, but he would also email and he would send me these long email and he said all the right things. I loved what he had to say, but of course was hesitant because he started saying all this stuff two weeks after we start chatting. I was waiting for the bomb to drop and it did. He asked me to pay for his internet and even told what website to go. Again are you kidding me! No I am not paying for your damn internet. I told him no that I couldn't do it. Shortly after that we also stopped chatting. STRIKE THREE! Oh and I also want to mention that he said he was working undercover. Really? You are working undercover in a war zone and talking with a total stranger about. If you are going to scam someone at least making sound reasonable.
Strike four is Keith Engle. Keith also said he was in the U.S. Army and stationed in Herat, Afghanistan. He said he was special forces. We have actually been talking for about a month maybe a little longer and at first I thought he wasn't a scam because he didn't ask for money right away or tell me he was madly in love with me two seconds after starting to get to know each. I was so excited I thought I might have finally found someone that there would be potential!! Yippee!!! Again I was wrong. =(
Yesterday Keith asked if I could help him out with some money to send to his mom. I am not going to lie I was waiting for that bomb to drop. I searched his photos on Google image and one came up under a scam, but the rest didn't which lead me to believe he might be legit, I should have gone with my gut instinct and stopped talking to him sooner, but I was actually having some good conversation with him and he typed decent. He had the occasional typo, but he typed like someone from the United States so I second guessed myself and kept chatting with him via Yahoo. I kind of wondered if he was a scam because I would notice he wouldn't answer all the questions I asked and his answers were very vague. He had told me his mom was sick with cancer and diabetes and she didn't have the money to pay for all her medications. His tragic story was a little different than the other guys. He didn't loose a wife or have kids. Keith was a little more believable. I'm sure we will stop talking shortly too.
While chatting with these guys I did do some research regarding online dating scams and it happens a lot, a lot more than I would have ever imaged. I lucked out and did not loose any money. These guys had all the red flags that these sites said to look out for. Sob stories to pull at a person's heart strings and get you to send money. Good thing I don't have any extra money to send.
I have tried some other websites and found guys locally, but I did not have luck with those either. So for now I will continue to go about my day as usual and maybe I will run into a guy in the grocery store or a coffee shop. I am hopeless romantic so I believe there is still hope that I will find my Mr.Right and live happily ever after with a couple of kids or cute dog.
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